Hi friend,
By the time you get this email, I'll be putting Rabnoor (my 5-month-old baby girl) to sleep after spending the last few hours at our first-ever kids' birthday party.
How life has changed! 😅
Not in a way I expected it to.
Today I want to share some goals I set, back when I was studying for my Master's degree in Manchester, England. I was 22 years old, and wrote down a bunch of things I wanted to do before I reached 30.
Why 30?
Because it's kinda the deadline society has on us, isn't it? If you're over 30, you'll call it BS. If you're in your twenties, you'll relate.
So here's how things have turned out since then.
❌ Get married by 28
Luckily, unlike many Indian families, mine didn't pressure me. My parents didn't really bother about it, and I found Jai when I was 25.
We married a year later, at 26.
I don't know why I kept 28 as the year, don't ask me that.
OK fine, I'll tell you - it's because some random palm reader at the mall told me I'll get married by 28! 😂😂😂
Don't judge me! I can feel you cringing till here!
❌ Be a consultant so I can travel the world for free
I love to travel.
It wasn't always this way. I fell in love with travelling without a concrete plan when I solo-travelled across Europe in 2018.
I was told that people in the front, in business class, were consultants. When I dug deeper, I realised that consultants get paid to travel.
It sounded so exciting, and that's what I wanted!
As fate had it, I got rejected from Big 4.
Which is a blessing because I travel to 4-5 countries each year without being a consultant... and I'm grateful for that.
It also took me much longer to realise that travelling for work is... literally just work. Not exploring or self-awareness in the way I expected it to be, of course.
❌ Have a kid by 30
I was diagnosed with PCOS when I was 12.
My mum is 20 years older than me.
Now, they're two completely unrelated statements, but
- PCOS can lead to fertility issues
- and I desperately wanted to be a young mum
(30 is considered early in my circle)
I delivered a baby girl 6 months ago.
It felt a year too early because as you see, the 'plan' was to be a mum a year later.
This was also a lesson that the best things in life don't happen according to your list.
❌ Make 1 lac ($1039) a month
This was a big amount to my 22-year-old self.
It is still a large amount in my country.
But if my business makes this much... it will be my lowest-earning month. Let's leave it at that :)
❌ Have a business
This was one of the 'unrealistic' goals I had because nobody around me is self-employed. I've always wanted to do this, especially with something creative.
I didn't know how.
I didn't plan.
I know, I just wanted to even back then.
It's in 2020 that I side-hustled alongside my full-time job, earned 3x of that, so I could quit it.
If you've read it this far
You would've noticed that not everything worked according to the plan.
In fact... most things didn't work out. And they made space for better things to happen.
I'm a bit weird because my constant thought process when I fail or when things don't work out is
- the universe has my back
- something better is in store for me
- everything happens for the good
Maybe it's to brace my heart from aches.
Maybe it's true.
I don't know, but I'll continue to blindly have faith in an energy higher than us all and follow my bliss.
Love,
N